Jul 31, 2012

Back to School...But Not For Me

I am a total freak about back to school supplies, especially when all the local adds are featuring deals on new crayons, No. 2 pencils, and binder paper. Oh heavens, the packs of fresh binder paper! I miss those good old days of picking out a new messenger bag, the cutest puppy folders, and convincing my mom I absolutely needed and would certainly use the neon highlighter 20 pack if she bought it for my junior high career. In high school I opted for a sturdy back pack, patterned folders, some swim goggles, and the 30 pack of highlighters. Even at university I met the new school year with much anticipation, tapping my fingers while I mused about which day planner I would purchase. In college I really did put those highlighter packs to good use, as well as numerous spiral bound notebooks.

There is something singular and meaningful about taking down notes by hand. My last year I decided to opt out of such a trivial and time consuming commitment to my notes. Instead I packed my laptop along to classes and typed away while also finishing a game of Solitaire during lectures. Little did I realize just how much I missed writing things out until I found my stacks of spiral bounds from previous years. They were full of smudges, doodles, and of course notes. I marveled a moment at the regression of my handwriting. I skimmed my finger over the graphs, charts, and outlines. I blushed at the scribbling that came as a result from daydreaming about my new last name. I kept them, all of my notebooks from semesters past.

Yet, my very last three semesters I only have digital files to show for it. No hideous handwriting, no scribbles, and no daydreaming doodles. It makes my heart ache a little, not having those things from perhaps the most proud moment of my life; finishing school, graduating from college.

I am missing school this year, no doubt, but I am also very much enjoying the mommy thing. I am in awe of those women who are strong, determined, and courageous enough to take their little ones along with them to classes. I could never have done something like that. Instead, this time of year where school supplies are prevalent, I find I am grateful to be finished with school so I can focus on raising my son. I miss it, yes, but I wouldn't trade what I have now for anything. Except maybe a fresh pack of binder paper and some highlighters. Maybe ;)

1 comment:

  1. happened to come across your blog. very cute love your writing!